Sisters-in-law Act 3 Scene 1

I must secretly make this post while I remain unwatched, as I never know when someone will be sneaking up to see what I'm doing, yak my ear off, give me instructions on something to do, or try and speed me along to get out the door to work.

My house is no longer my own. My belongings are no longer my own. My bedroom is no longer a secret, private place. I've become a lost soul, wandering from room to room, trying to evade either the work-aholic giving me stuff to do, or the lazy fat-ass trying to tell me about some episode of some sci-fi show she saw back in the 80's.

When the phone rings and I say "wait until it picks up so I'll know who it is", the fat-ass ignores me, says "I know how to find out" and picks it up herself to chat with whoever may be calling me.

When the work-aholic says "Matt, can I borrow your cell phone", the fat-ass answers for me with "Sure!".

I came downstairs this morning to find f.a. (fat-ass-sister-in-law) feeding melted mozzarella to my daughter for breakfast. Then she takes a sip out of MY coffee cup, by "accident"....I had to burn the cup. Then f.a. takes a break, she grabs a newspaper and heads upstairs to abuse my toilet. At least she's going upstairs this time, instead of before when she used the downstairs powder room and we were all invited to hear her grunts.

I'm very tired. At 2 a.m. w.a. (work-a-holic-sister-in-law) was still running around cleaning, and she had my entire bed covered in baby's clothes she was washing, sorting, and folding. I went back into my office, and f.a. was sitting at the computer....don't make eye-contact...oh CRAP! she saw me, "Hey Matt, listen to this email I got. 'You can make thousands of dollars buying and selling mortgages. Guaranteed!' I sometimes answer these, there's so many great deals out there, I don't know how they got my email address, but I'm trying to look into all these good offers."

With a weak claim of "hearing someone calling me" I slink away, not bothering to, once again, try and explain that she's a damn fool and those are all scams and it's people like her that crap up the world for the rest of us by even reading them.

Every morning w.a. manages to get to my daughters room before me when Katelyn wakes up, and she takes her downstairs and gives her breakfast. Now you would think that this would give me the oppurtunity to sleep in, say until maybe 8:30....please?
Fat chance. She comes knocking at my door, "Are you awake? It's time to get dressed and get to work!"

So what am I doing still sitting at home at 10 a.m.? I'm rebelling.