News flash...the world is full of assholes. I know that this will be a shock to the good readers of the pink pony diaries...but I assure you that it is true. My sister was a victim of one this very morning. Many of you already know the long, complicated and never-ending drama that is my sister Tiffany's life. In a nutshell, Tiff overcame a long chemical addiction, attended and graduated computer school and had a baby. For the last two years, Tiffany has been trying trying to find a life for herself. She is a full-time housewife and mother of two. Lately she has been seeking work outside of the house, preferably in the computer field. Entry-level positions in the computer world are few and far between. Most computer folks had to kiss miles of ass and have more than a little bit of luck to land their first position. I myself suffered through 51 rejection letters before I lucked out on the 52nd ( I guess I lucked out , I have not decided yet ).
Anyway back to the story. A friend of mine from computer school, Kathy, called me early one morning last week with the good news that an entry level position had opened up at her company and that she had put in Tiff's resume. The man looking to fill the job called Tiff that very afternoon, and wanted to set up an interview post haste. Tiff called me on my cell phone, a nervous wreck. "Doodle, when should I go in for an interview?" "He wants me to come in today...I am freaking out" Given the shaky condition that she was in I recommended that she make the interview for Monday the following week. I wanted her to calm down and brush up on some of her computer skills ( she had been out of school for two years and was a little rusty ). Also, I thought we could have a nice lunch with Kathy ( whom she had not met yet ), and she could tell Tiff about the job. This simple and seemingly infallible plan went wrong in a big way.
The man who scheduled the interview, (Oscar) emailed Tiffany to let her know that he needed to reschedule. Understandably upset by this last minute change ( and also she had arranged child care for her son ), she called Oscar early this morning to setup another interview. This is where things get weird. Oscar tells her that the position is no longer open but that he will keep her resume. Tiffany, understandably upset, calls Kathy to find out what happened to the job. It turns out that even though Oscar recieved Tiff's resume from Kathy, Oscar did not like Kathy. When Oscar found out that Tiff was having lunch with Kathy ( and I ) before her interview with him, he freaked. He thought that Kathy was going to tell Tiffany a bunch of bad things about him. He then tried (via email - which if you are not a computer geek, you do not check every five seconds ) to up the interview date to a day before the lunch with Kathy. When Tiff did not respond, he called up a friend of his that needed a job and offered the position to him. When Kathy came into work today, Oscar took her aside and told her to keep her nose out of his business. Although not a nice way to start the day, Kathy was not intimidated by this peon, and took the matter up with his higher up. A long story short, a nice person ( Kathy ) stuck out her neck for a friend ( Me ) to help his sister ( Tiff ). What should have been a simple transaction turned ugly because of some self-important dill weed's insecurity.
Oscar doesn't know it but he was playing games with one of North Fultons most notorious family of rednecks. My father, brother and sister have no fear of death or the law. Oscar is only lucky in the fact that my sister was not there in person. She is a 6ft blonde with a temper that would rival the devil's. On any given day , she can stream forth a mouth full of 'fuck-you's' worthy of being noted in the guiness book of world records. And she fights dirty...balls and hair-pulling and throat punching are all in her repotoire. I can only hope that my brother does not find out about ole Oscar. He has been known to jump over desks and bitch slap assholes till they cry and piss themselves. Last but not least, I DO hope that my dad finds out. People's magazine named him meanest man of the year, 10 years running. Confrontation is my dad's oxygen. One wrong eye twitch from Oscar, one carelessly thought out word, one move that was not nice and slow, and my dad would introduce Oscar to Elvis. Me, on the other hand, I like God to take care of my enemies. I know that he is much better at it than I. Perhaps Oscar will wake up one morning with his asshole glued shut by infected hemorroids. Perhaps his girlfriend will leave him for a circus midget. Perhaps worms will start living in his teeth. What kind of a slimy, whithered dick, corn-hole smelling, dumbass donkey wagon driving son of a bitch plays power games with innocent people ? I'll tell ya what kind...the kind that needs his ass beat like a Pinata full of crack.
