In reference to GS3's last post, as well as other friends we have, it seems a lot of us, including me, had a brother who was the favorite, and nothing great I do can ever compare to his commonplace adventures. I remember telling my dad that I had won an award at work for being such a good peon....I think it was peon on the year or something. I received a thousand dollars, plus a week long all expense paid trip for two at a 5 star resort.
But I didn't get that far in the explanation, since my dad cut me off to say "well, Mike is going to be in a parade with his truck." And his inflection when saying "Mike" suggests that the comparison is actually a competition that I'm losing and my dad is proving it. I think the parade was just a bunch of rednecks driving muddy trucks around a small town square to impress the young redneck girls and the village idiot. Hey, that's a Saturday night where I grew up!
I can remember my mother being so proud when she told me how Mike had finally moved out on his own and had his own phone and was paying his own utilities and everything! "What a big boy, he is" I could almost hear her thinking. Although he was 28 at the time, and a few months later he'd dropped the whole "living on his own" idea to move back in with my folks, and back into the little bedroom he's been in since he was 5.
Of course his biggest adventure was getting married, the first time, when he was 24 and she was 16. Since she was still in high school and had a bad home life, it seemed like a good idea. I mean, am I right? Then they both moved into my brother's bedroom, and his mommy became his wife's mommy. She washed their clothes and cooked for them and woke them up in the morning and drove her to school. Of course it didn't last. To her it was like going steady in some bizarro type universe, and when she got tired of it she just left.
Why am I saving for retirement and my daughter's college education while my brother's saving for a new rollbar for his pickup. And why does he impress my father so much more?
Shit.
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Yes it is bizarre good reader, what grog and gs3 can attest to is the simple truth.Although this never happened in my family I have seen it in relatives, friends and true detective magazines. My experiences however fall more in the line of lady friends. Many female friends will tell me of their new boyfriend and his many accomplishments.."he just bought a Dodge Acclaim, a nice new car!(1988 model, smokes , bald tires,but he finally got his credit up to where he could confidentaly shop on Buford highway at Diego's Honest Hombre's Walk IN And DRIVE out!)Or the Christmas he didn"t buy her a gift because he had a DUI and had to pay all of his money from his paycheck(at his great job loading boxes at UPS since he was a college graduate in 1988.But hey he's a rebel and he won't take the man's stinkin' management position because he's a dreamer baby and his big break is just around the corner conveniently located next to Elmo's Liquor and Check Cashing)Or how about this one, an ex-girlfriend calls me up for dinner and I say sure. We meet at the old Blue Ribbon Grill. She looks great, always did. So we go into the meal and she says "i guess your're wondering why I asked you to dinner" Sure", "We'll I just wanted you to know that I was getting married" "OH ...But we just broke up 3 weeks ago?" "Well yes but I just meet him and we"ve been living together for two weeks" "Go On" I say. "well as soon a he gets his divorce,..Finishes filing bankruptcy and tells his 8 year old daughter that is living with us we will be married in Vegas if his probation officer says he can go."Six weeks later she was pregnant , they married at the courthouse before the second child and 5 years ,and many bitter disputes later he disappeared with A Waffle House waitress 23 years his junior.Or how about the sexy and lively, well educated girl with the "natural " child waiting for her son's father to get his one-eyed drug-trafficking recedivist self out of prison after he serves a six year term."Wait for me honey, and will raise a little rebel like his daddy"Raising Arizonia" is not a comedy, no, in fact it was the first reality show about women of modern america, and the men they love.There is more truth in 1 second of that film than in Michael Moore's entire grubby ,empty hole in the air existence.The pathology of aberrant parents and there physcotic affection towards the failed offspring and women's predeliction for men defined not by the sucess'es, but by their failures would be far more worthy of research that 90% of the pointless studies we pay for now.When I have sold my last bail of cotton to the speculators, run my last custom built blockade runner on the shoals of Cape Hatteras, I will endow a chair at Clemson to research this deviancy.
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